Her eyes
never allowed
boredom
upon her heart.
Each light, or shadow
held a secret treasure,
a passionate perspective
awaiting to be unlocked
and displayed.
When she shared
her vision
my humbled glance
gathered in
so splendid a moment
I paused in awe.
Last Few Words: Written in response to an absolutely stunning set of photos taken by someone I know.
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
Hi vex
A picture worth 1000 words eh? Some photos are impossible to describe in words. Got a few ideas that you can think on :
change awaiting to waiting
My humbled glance
gathered
in so splendid a moment..........just a thought...........stan