judyanne
judyanne
Mar 13, 2015

the bequest (to my grandson)

Poem Body

.

a wondrous favour bestowed on me

a gem that shone in life's waters

Heaven, for her own reasons

on a sorrow-filled day

took my gift away

but not before

he'd found love

and made

you

.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: nonet..... a poem of nine lines, the first line has nine syllables, the next eight, then seven, six and so on to one.....

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Western Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Favourite poets? So many, so varied. I like particular songs, not necessarily the singer... and the same goes for poetry. I can honestly say though, that Alfred Noyes' The Highwayman was what inspired my love of poetry - my mother began reading it to me when I was still a baby, and it became my favourite bedtime story

More from this author

Comments

R

raj

10 years 1 month ago

simple and beautiful expression ..

Regards,

judyanne

Thank you very much for the read and kind comment
love judy
xxx

Rula

Rula

10 years 1 month ago

It's been long since I wrote a nonet.
This is nice. He must be happy to receive such a tender gift

But not sure about the syllable count in the first line. I thought they are ten where they should be nine?

judyanne

that dipthong thing again - i'm taking it that, as it is only counts as a third of a beat, it's not countable as a full syllable - I think we can play with that a bit ... it seems at the end of a sentence I want to drag the sound of dipthong-ending words out a bit - so could count it there - but I say them without needing another beat for the s or r or what ever the ending when they are within a sentence...it depends on how it sounds when we break the rules as to whether it is passable....

and i can sing 'wondrous' with two notes
thanks Rula
xxx

Rula

Rula

10 years 1 month ago

I just thought these forms are very sensitive when it comes to the syllable count.
Just thought I would mention it anyway.
We can avoid such deceiving words when it all depends on the syllable count, can't we?

What do you think dear?