49reasons
Jun 21, 2011

here the tears flow

Poem Body

somewhere between
fear and trepidation

across pages of words
left for another to read

beyond the memories
of moments held in photos

yet still I need

the days
to complete the lists

the nights
to celebrate life

and easy breaths
to fit it all in

.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?

Review Request Intensity: Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Melbourne, Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda, Charles Bukowski, Anne Waldman

More from this author

Comments

Barbara Writes

Nice poem I like the title a lot and it flowed well. Come join us in the splash pool you will enjoy the experience. And benefit from the freshing splashes of poetic knowledge we all enjoy here

K

I like your poetry! Succinct, full of meaning and easy to read.

Waited until another poem was posted before I commented. All too often first poems are the best poems and the poetry goes downhill after that. Not in your case.

Welcome aboard Jules. What IS in that fucking Aussie water, anyway?????????????????

~A

together we'll find 50 reasons
to leave your lover and
51 seasons to write a poem

what god hath put together
let no man pull asunder
it's the word
that shines like jewels

;-)

R

raj

13 years 10 months ago

i liked the unique style of your expressing a forlorn mood...

you may want to remove "still" from "yet still i need"...