Poem Body
sometimes
i watch
starlings
gather
on power lines
first, just a few
and soon hundreds
side by side
symmetrical
quiet, waiting
until, as if
a perfect note
trembles beneath
their wings
they lift in flight
like so many ribbons
in a ballet
swirling to the left
soaring upwards
returning to center
resting when it's time to rest
then rising, like a symphony
inspired to fly...
Comments
The title I found to be a
The title I found to be a great title. I had to look it up and found that it defines the gathering of starlings.
Good poem, great title. It makes one think!
Hello, Clentin,
Watching this elegant occurrence has always intrigued me.
Thank you for reading!
L
Something
I used to sit and watch when outside or in my parents pool. I often wondered what they were doing on those wires or poles and what they were thinking or talking about with each other. I love the form you used for this. The pauses gave the reader time to think about each stanza and what was happening. Great work!
Hello, Carrie,
Yes! I've wondered what they were thinking about, too. I wanted to leave off punctuation and stay with lowercase to keep it as light as possible, and give space between thoughts. Thank you for reading!
L
interesting,,
i really like the formatting in the stanzas. your use of language is very pretty, and makes me think vividly of a swan, if that makes sense. pretty simple over all (thats not a bad thing). i look forward to reading more of your work!
Hello, Soph,
Thoughts of a swan - lovely! I was hoping the poem was graceful and simple, much like the beautiful flight of the starlings.
Thank you for reading and sharing such kind words,
L