Poem Body
Once
He wanted to land in silence
But then he saw that was only the sky
Another one
The highest
Aug 01, 2014
The nothing
About This Poem
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Once
He wanted to land in silence
But then he saw that was only the sky
Another one
The highest
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
You like short poems
You like short poems
hello
it only looks like short ;)
good answer
Emina.
I have always believed that poetry is saying the most in the least possible words.
A powerful poem.
yes that's true
and it's always the hardest to write them like this
emina
can tell me more about the poem? pardon this amateur.
Alid
alidzain
this is Imagism poem
I'm speaking about a man that wants to land somewhere
so he is obviously metaphorically a bird
he's ''flying''
but that is more like state of mind
there is not many of us doing so I thing
he does not understand everything there
sometimes we want to know more
than we are supposed to
myself too
the term silence here
means rest
I once wrote that true silence doesn't exist
what we call silence always has a lot inside
but I feel like it should be empty space
vacuum in mind
but as a doctor I know that's not possible
it will never happen
so the title is the nothing
this poem is something like
impossible circle for a human
I guess this does not make this
even more complex
i,m afraid for the misconception
i think the poem should be reworked with some of the expressions in your commentary obviously prevalent over abstract , for it has less abstract features but i recommend your poetry that it is polished mince of Mercury
Emina
A write as with Esker that makes a person think many things, no matter how short, can hold a book, if all the thoughts it provokes in others are written down, this being one of them.
Well thought out and written with care.
Yours Ian.T
subtract impression
the poem is distort because, how can you say all this things of the man, knowing that , he only wants to land in silence and the allusion to the bird, how do you equate the feeling of the man to any relevance of totem for his irregularities as i am told in the commentary. he likes this he likes that........ he wants this he wants that be specific of his attitude in the poem which is your omniscient voice as a poet and as gonzago(from hamlet , the play in the play}
Emeka I refer you to the works of Marshal Macluhan
He refers to "hot" and "cold" media. Passive, spoon-fed media, like television is 'cold', it disengages the brain. Poetry is far the 'hottest' media in that the reader is required to actively engage their imagination and intellect to derive content. The results can be wildly different, of course.
That is why my belief is that once we release our poetry into the world it no longer belongs to us, it belongs to the reader, they have worked for it and earned it.
conciousness....
the level states...
as with the falling away of below
the under
the top
over
another level...
Fantastic Poem !
thank U
Emina
This piece has succeeded in its concept no matter what.
The comments from other poets and the discussion about these few lines indicates the impact,
Yours as always Ian..
I flew,
yet never left the ground.
I soared,
with inner thoughts.
Never wanting to return.
Impressive abstract write,
Impressive abstract write, more comprehensible after your de-coding the abstract, bringing out the genius in you.
The title fits the meaning, may be Silence Speaks could also have worked...just a thought..
Regards,