Lavender
Lavender
Jun 17, 2024

Once Red Barn

Poem Body

Its meat falls off more each year
leaving open spaces between its bones
where snow gathers
and weeds climb.

It is gray, now,
and hides in the autumn rain,
perhaps like an old elephant,
large and saggy,
its trunk forever searching
for something lost in the earth.

From the country road,
it seems graceful
resting against the surrounding
sullen fields.

But something much like sleep
holds it there -
fettered in time
while all those who once adored
its bright red paint
made their way down the country road,
forgetting to look back,
leaving the snow and the weeds
to shelter its elephant bones.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: United States

Favorite Poets: I tend to read Ted Kooser, Jim Harrison, Paul Simon, Robert Frost. I like minimalist poetry, and poems reflecting on nature and Mother Earth.

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Comments

Sen99

Sen99

10 months 1 week ago

This has really nice use of physical imagery, word choices and storytelling, enjoyed the personification of a physical structure as an animal, and its decay over time, your poetry skills are always evident, thanks for the share.

Lavender

Thank you so much for reading, and many thanks for your generous comments! I'm especially glad you enjoyed the personification.
Best regards to you!
L

Geezer

I have seen them. The farm families that were the mainstay of rural communities,
have moved to the city. They have left behind, the weathered, grey elephants;
sometimes, pregnant with the green and red-rusted machines. Yes, times were different,
and they will be again. Nicely done, ~ Geez.
.

Lavender

Yes, the green and red-rusted tractors and machines. Those are left behind, too! There's something very melancholy about these left behind pieces of yesterday. They seem to come to life whenever I drive by, making me reflect on past times.
Thank you for reading!
L

Geezer

as our economy settles down, and people find that they are dissatisfied with cities, they will turn back to small farming.
I know that there seems to be a return to subsistence living. maybe a lot of these immigrants will pick up the farms and make a go of them. I enjoyed your take on this one. ~ Geez.
.

Lavender

I like your prediction, and hope that it comes true! There are still some rural areas to be found, and I love the character and the scenery these old barns give us.
Thank you for reading again!
L