c lynn brooks
May 17, 2021
This poem is part of the contest:

Write a poem as an alter ego.

(Read More...)

Shadows Of The Night ( contest Entry)

Poem Body

Shadows Of The Night
By Damien Stryker

I roam the shadows of the night
in search of my delicate prey
perhaps she will wander into sight
daylight will be upon us soon
so quickly I must work
by the light of the moon
first her throat I will gently taste
to not sink my teeth in
would be such a waste
such a pity
moonlight has passed
so I travel home
without my lass

Damien Stryker

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: north carolina usa, USA

Favorite Poets: Leonard Cohen, Edgar Alan Poe, ray Bradbury, John Grissom, .Alan S Jeeves James patterson,

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Comments

Geezer

Geezer

3 years 11 months ago

I mean, you have all the elements here, but it seems like you were in too much of a hurry to get this done. Draw it out a bit! Let it build up and tell us about the emotion, tell us the feel of the night, the taste of her blood! I know you are not much for rhyme, so if it stifles you, do it free style. Good start!
~ Geez.
.

C

Thanks let me mull it over a bit and see what I can come up with

Candlewitch

you have given us a little taste, which teases us to want more, greedy things that we are! you have a good base here, now give us some landscaping. (by way of details) we really like what you have so far. more please?

*hugs, Cat
ever, eddy styx
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Candlewitch

I was wondering... should the word "site" be (sight)? or is it a play on words? it is so very nice to see you here, I have missed you!

*hugs, Cat
& eddy styx
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