I lay awake a night of squalling rain
and list for that I heard once long ago,
of pipe and string that plied a mournful strain,
an Elfish song of sorrow, sage and slow.
‘Twas heard by me the first when but a child,
a song of ruthe amidst a nameless storm.
Though lyricless it spoke of faith defiled
and false respect that took a heinous form.
Strange tears I shed that cold and anxious night.
The song was as a shaft that sought my heart
and I could feel refrains of lonesome flight.
Their nocturne quavered, they would soon depart.
Why would they play in such, these minstrels fey
and near, so near, to open window mine?
What magic spell they plied I cannot say,
but I do not forget that graced design.
And so I listen when the evening wind
is full of rain in hopes to ken the tune.
But I, full well, know all they shall rescind
when Faerie flees Man’s drear and graying moon.
Comments
I love this write Wes -
but I keep tripping up in the last verse of the fourth stanza...
would
'but never I'll forget that graced design'
or 'but never will I forget that graced design'
work for you?
lo - I do suck at titles Wes ... perhaps
the descant of the storm
???
love judy
xxx
Wes
How about "Song Of The Fey"
Alid
Wesley
A title for this one could just be:- "Lament" this would encompass all the ways of hearing something that gave you those feelings of distant shores and pipes to yen for,
Yours Ian..
"pouring Melodramas"
.
In memory sleeps
In memory sleeps
wow I don't know how many times I have read this poem
it is just sad but beautiful
liked it
liked it
How about "Music of the Night" ?
And that last line.....might try faeries flee instead of faery flees........stan
In that last line
I didn't mean a bunch of faeries, but rather the concept of Faerie.
Hasty reading
makes for misinterpretations. And I Now see your meaning........stan
a title , ha
good use of meaning to word imagery, i see that Valhalla coming
Are we going to reveal the actual title?
.
Taking minor risk being here
One of the final steps of shop will be for writers to either use title suggestions to come up with their own title or choose a suggested title from among those suggested
I still like mine:
"Echoes". A lot of good ideas though.
:)
I believe no one knows better than the author what are his intentions when he composed the piece, hence comes the title whether before or after writing the poem.
The title came first.
I wanted to write a Tolkien poem.
Echoes
I Like single word titles and this one fits the poem well in my opinion.......stan
Read!
"Jane" by John Masefield.
Your vision was tainted by your upbringing.
That's where "Lost" lost me.
Too much bullshit unanswerable answers. There have got to be answers..
Ah, sometimes there are no answers.
Sometimes the answers remain hidden. Dissonance is not a bad thing. Sometimes the tension of unanswered questions leaves a reader in a bit of disarray. This is a good thing.
True enough, Wesley..
Even cognitive dissonance makes us question, if we are not controlled by dogma.
Jess and Wesley
Cognitive Dissonance,
Damn and here was me thinking in four letter words, now there is a real conflict of attitudes to poetry
You educated poets are making me uncomfortable, so do we try to alter one side’s attitude.
So that we can restore a balance on this site with this workshop.
You see if you are going to throw long words and forms at me causing me a great discomfort, what do I do to correct this problem.
Can I refer to my inner self and hold all the attitudes and ways of everyone in a form of harmony so that there is no strife within Neopoet, avoiding all forms of disharmony or dissonance.
I remember a man called Festinger who came out with a theory that the attitudes may change because of the factors within a person.
I think that we must seek consistency in our ways of producing poetry, where the differences of any situation is inconsistent.
So all this means is that we should agree to disagree and get on with writing our own style of poetry
Cognitive dissonance through forced compliance of our behaviour cannot be attained,
So let’s cut the crap and long words and learn to get on with each other.
Good that's today sermon, love you both and hope to see improved writings from you both in critique and poetry from now on,
Yours loving you both,
Sparrow
try a dictionary
it's never too late.
Jess
Loves yu my Bru,
Yours Ian
Questions
in poetry are often denigrated if too many are asked. But isn't one thing poetry supposed to do is make people think? And a well asked question stated within the right poem can make a person think a lot. .........stan